Monday, June 09, 2008

I am

It was with mixed emotions that I read Peach’s blog this morning about the contributors who had made selection for the You’re Not The Only One book, which you can purchase here.




I was delighted to see six friends and Novel Racers had been selected: Leigh Forbes; Deborah Carr; Jenny Maltby; Helen Redfern; Kate Kingsley; Zinnia Cyclamen.

I am trying very hard to develop a thicker skin as I type because I wasn’t selected, but a tiny weeny piece of me is relieved that my horrible piece of writing never needs to see the light of day. Just to torment myself I went back and reread it this morning.

I went through all the usual reactions: shouting at Husband that his bloody alarm clock was going off loudly and enthusiastically while he snoozed on; self loathing; desiring to give up; wondering why I was doing this; deciding that I was shit; deciding that I was wasting money; apologising to Husband; big fat sloshy tears; feeling relieved that this horrible piece of writing wasn’t going to represent me; wondering what in god’s name I could do if I wasn’t ‘trying to write’ (probably the most depressing thought because I’m clean out of ideas.)

Anyway, despite the wallowing in self pity, I can’t quit just yet because I’ve got a cursin’ deadline tomorrow, and a pile of crap writing to knock into shape.

8 comments:

Jen said...

Aw, JJ, it doesn't mean your piece was crap, it just means it wasn't quite right on this occasion.

And it's no good cursing your deadline - you have it because people want to read what you write!

X

Lane Mathias said...

I didn't make it either and I submitted two pieces which were more or less straight off my blog:-(

Like Jen says, we shouldn't take it personally. It just wasn't what they were looking for.

I'll join you in the mixed emotion department:-)

Jenny Beattie said...

Jen, oh I know and I actually knew that the story I was telling was the wrong audience... when will I ever learn not to submit in a rush?

Lane, oh I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to come across as all miserable and sorry for myself. I know i have to get used to it, but I don't think I have to like it!

My big issue, Jen, is that I'm utterly unconvinced that I DO want anyone to read it!

Yvonne said...

I didn't make it either - last time I submit something without going over it properly first. Feeling a bit crap today too.

Rose Red Art said...

JJ, you and me both. I subbed one piece and it wasn't selected either. I feel a bit pants about it but I did sub in a rush so I shouldn't have expected anything.

Still feel crappy about it though. I want a nibble, just ONE little nibble from someone, anyone just so I know I'm not wasting my time....:(

Leigh Forbes said...

Oh, JJ. And you were so quick to get over to mine and leave nice words. You're a real hug-earning pal.

xx

Deborah Carr (Debs) said...

Drat, I just commented and lost it somehow (serves me right for trying to do this at work with no-one looking).

I was moaning to my poor long-suffering father on Sat that I'm now being rejected as far away as NY.

Dx

Carol said...

I'm sorry that your piece wasn't selected but I do agree with what everyone else has said.....your writing is not crap.....the piece you submitted just wasn't quite what they were looking for this time.

Keep your chin up hon

C x