Monday, June 09, 2008

I am

It was with mixed emotions that I read Peach’s blog this morning about the contributors who had made selection for the You’re Not The Only One book, which you can purchase here.

I was delighted to see six friends and Novel Racers had been selected: Leigh Forbes; Deborah Carr; Jenny Maltby; Helen Redfern; Kate Kingsley; Zinnia Cyclamen.

I am trying very hard to develop a thicker skin as I type because I wasn’t selected, but a tiny weeny piece of me is relieved that my horrible piece of writing never needs to see the light of day. Just to torment myself I went back and reread it this morning.

I went through all the usual reactions: shouting at Husband that his bloody alarm clock was going off loudly and enthusiastically while he snoozed on; self loathing; desiring to give up; wondering why I was doing this; deciding that I was shit; deciding that I was wasting money; apologising to Husband; big fat sloshy tears; feeling relieved that this horrible piece of writing wasn’t going to represent me; wondering what in god’s name I could do if I wasn’t ‘trying to write’ (probably the most depressing thought because I’m clean out of ideas.)

Anyway, despite the wallowing in self pity, I can’t quit just yet because I’ve got a cursin’ deadline tomorrow, and a pile of crap writing to knock into shape.


SpiralSkies said...

Aw, JJ, it doesn't mean your piece was crap, it just means it wasn't quite right on this occasion.

And it's no good cursing your deadline - you have it because people want to read what you write!


Lane said...

I didn't make it either and I submitted two pieces which were more or less straight off my blog:-(

Like Jen says, we shouldn't take it personally. It just wasn't what they were looking for.

I'll join you in the mixed emotion department:-)

JJ said...

Jen, oh I know and I actually knew that the story I was telling was the wrong audience... when will I ever learn not to submit in a rush?

Lane, oh I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to come across as all miserable and sorry for myself. I know i have to get used to it, but I don't think I have to like it!

My big issue, Jen, is that I'm utterly unconvinced that I DO want anyone to read it!

Yvonne said...

I didn't make it either - last time I submit something without going over it properly first. Feeling a bit crap today too.

A. Writer said...

JJ, you and me both. I subbed one piece and it wasn't selected either. I feel a bit pants about it but I did sub in a rush so I shouldn't have expected anything.

Still feel crappy about it though. I want a nibble, just ONE little nibble from someone, anyone just so I know I'm not wasting my time....:(

Leigh said...

Oh, JJ. And you were so quick to get over to mine and leave nice words. You're a real hug-earning pal.


Debs said...

Drat, I just commented and lost it somehow (serves me right for trying to do this at work with no-one looking).

I was moaning to my poor long-suffering father on Sat that I'm now being rejected as far away as NY.


Carol and Chris said...

I'm sorry that your piece wasn't selected but I do agree with what everyone else has said.....your writing is not crap.....the piece you submitted just wasn't quite what they were looking for this time.

Keep your chin up hon

C x